From Megan.

at Panera

It's about to rain and I'm sitting here drinking my coffee and eating my French Toast bagel listening to some education majors studying for their final. Ick.

I want to shout "ESCAPE! GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN!" at them. But I will refrain. Perhaps they are elementary ed majors in which case there is much less cause for alarm.

The blonde is wearing jewelry, makeup and an incredibly short skirt. She has no idea.

At the very least they could have chosen some other spot in which to conduct their business. I think they're elevating my blood pressure.

Right after coming over and sharing germs.

Alexis:
Hey would you like to write my sponsor letter?
I will pay you $50.
pppplllleeeaaaasssseee.
I'm sorry for breathing on you.
ppppplllleeeeaaassseeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just the weather.

Her: It was CRAZY. It was like "Raaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrr! raaarrrrr! raAAARRRRrrr! (tiger claw hand motions) Shake, shake, shake, shake! (the "Twist") Skeet-skeet-skeet! Skeet-skeet! (zigzag hand motions)"
Me: (speechless)
Her: The "skeet skeet" was for the trees scraping against the windows.

A Cautionary Tale for Book-Lovers.

So there I am, minding my own business at Borders on a Friday night, drinking my almond latte and perusing displays of new fiction, when suddenly I am the addressee of the single worst pickup line I have ever had the misfortune to hear.

Guy: You look well-read.
(Pause)
Me: Um. Really?
Guy: Yeah. You just look like you’ve read a lot. I was wondering if you could suggest any good nonfiction.
Me: Um. I, er, I don’t really read nonfiction... often. (Looking pointedly at the stack of fiction on the table below.)
Guy: Oh. Really? Oh.
(Awkward pause)
Guy: I listen to it on my ipod. While I run.
Me: Oh. Wow. That’s… impressive. (Very interested in this book I randomly selected.)
Guy: I have an anthology that has summaries for five hundred famous works of fiction. I just read the summaries because they give you the main themes. All I want’s the main themes... so why waste my time reading all that other stuff? It’s great.
(Very deliberate pause. I consider spilling latte on myself so that I can escape.)
Me: I was an English major. I like that other stuff.

The conversation (if you can call it that) did not end there. This charming, nonfiction-reading assailant continued to ask me things like “do you like dancing?” until I was forced to pretend I had somewhere to go. This was extremely annoying as I did not manage to purchase any new books, which was, of course, the object of going to Borders in the first place.

Lesson: Don’t go into Borders by yourself on Friday nights. And for Pete’s sake, TRY to not look well-read.

New digs.

It is considered an honor at the University to live in one of the prestigious Range rooms. Located in Mr. Jefferson's original buildings, these rooms are truly in the center of the University. The setting is the beautiful Lawn, probably the most popular place for students to relax, study, and play.

Because the Academical Village is a national landmark and World Heritage Site, you must be respectful of the space especially immediately outside of your room, which is public space.
Accordingly, be careful about what you leave outdoors. The only items that should be kept outside your door are your firewood, your ash holder, and a grill (no larger than 18").

Fireplace - check.
National landmark/World Heritage Site - check.
Thomas Jefferson, Edgar Allan Poe, Woodrow Wilson - check.
http://www.student.virginia.edu/range/

I hope it works. I hope it works. It worked!!!

Q: Which of the following is the correct (read: only) way to purchase an underground ticket to destinations outside zone 2 in London?

A) I'd like to buy a [single/one-day] ticket. (Assume you'll be asked which zone.)
B) I'd like to buy a [single/one-day] ticket including zone 6 please.
C) I'd like to buy a [single/one-day] ticket - I have to get to Heathrow.
D) I am GOING to HEATHROW AIRPORT. I need a ticket. Please. Thanks.